Mar 2, 2010

Coworker Confessions: The Lunch Hour Bandit

Welcome to my new series of laugh-your-ass-off stories about people that I've come across in professional environments, be it school or work. Every so often I'll post my personal synopsis of a selected individual, attempt to give you a visual and a few chuckles here and there. Please note that some of these people have multiple personalities, so there may be more than one post per person. Introducing... The Lunch Hour Bandit!

Upon starting my internship at CC, the rules and office protocol wasn't really explained to me. I spent much of my first 2 weeks figuring out how things worked around here. I never knew that something as simple as a lunch schedule would cause so much commotion.

The Lunch Hour Bandit apparently felt (and still does) that her lunch hour should be 1p every single day. Regardless of whether she came in at 8a or 10a. Regardless of whether someone else came in before her that hasn't taken their lunch yet. The LHB whines when others leave for lunch and she's left to tame these wild students alone, but closes her window at 12:59:59, long line, short line... doesn't matter. She'll even go as far as to come to your workstation to remind you that you should go to lunch at a certain time because she HAS to go at 1p. One time while our other intern was helping out a student, she walked up to her window, flipped over her 'closed' sign and walked back to her cubicle. If you can imagine, the clock struck 12:01p and the LHB was furious that she had to go to lunch 1 minute late. I always wondered what the big deal was, and then I figured it out. She takes her lunch break with her friend who works in our back office every single day, and since her friend has a set work schedule, she has to go at 1p. How childish??? Seriously, you can't always have your way. Unfortunately, if your supervisor baby's you because she feels sorry for you, then I guess you can manipulate others.

Well, let me tell you... one day she didn't take her lunch break until 1:30p because of me. I'm sorry, but if I work from 9a-5:30p, I should not be forced to take my lunch break at 11 or 11:30a and starve for the remainder of the day. I'm not even that hungry at that time. So when she asked me what time I was going to lunch... I told her my regular time- 12:30p. She repeated 12:30p several times while lingering around my workstation before she finally returned to her desk to mumble rude shit under her breath. Before the day was over, another coworker approached me about the situation. The next morning, our supervisor sent out a mass email stating that we should stick to our scheduled lunch times. That works for me considering I was never given one... oh well. And since my adorable intern friend works in the back now, I'd like to have lunch with her from time to time.

Have you ever dealt with a coworker that thought they ran everything, but was only really running their mouth?


Corporate Chickee said...

YES! I can definitely relate to this. I currently have to work with a coworker who worked at our company 10 years ago, took time off for family and is now back. In 10 years a LOT has changed, but she still believes she knows best and can make recommendations on how everyone else should do their jobs.

I've come close to actually saying something like, 'That's none of your concern" or "That's not really your business" etc. I hold my tongue, but man would I love to tell her what I think!

Ellen said...

Wow, Lunch Hour Bandit is right! And no, I could never, ever eat as early as 11am. Geeze, when I worked in an office, I never even had the luxury of taking an hour lunch. I usually took 10 minutes to scarf down my PB&J sandwich and scan Perez Hilton. Now, however, I work from home and it's lunch hour all day long. I haven't learned how to control the grazing yet, yikes!

Girl About Business said...

Corporate Chickee- those have got to be the worst types of people to work with... the ones resistant to change. Come on now, she couldn't really believe that in 10 years she can still run the place! So much can change in 10 years, literally the entire dynamic/nature of the company!

Ellen I desperately wish that I could work from home and munch on real food all day. About the LHB though, I have learned to ignore her early morning comments and not help her out only because when you do offer your help, she assumes that you're going to do her job everyday which then means that she may be able to run the show. Not on my clock... I kindly return to my cubicle and continue to go to lunch when I'm actually ready.

Anonymous said...

What you all dont seem to appreciate is that there IS apparently a routine established in your workplace. YOU are the new person. Get over it. Once you have worked some where and put in your time, then you can have the privileges reserved for people who have already done this. Surely, you don't expect someone who has worked many years more than you to take a back seat to you? If you do, then I'm guessing you probably think you should be entitled to personal phone calls, texting on the job and Facebook at your fingertips every minute you are not "busy". . .appreciate the fact you have a job and a lunch hour and get over yourself.

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